Rates & Information
I’m Ellie Messinger-Adams, a licensed therapist, maternal mental health specialist, and childhood development expert. I provide therapy for moms in San Marcos, Encinitas, Carlsbad, and across North County San Diego, as well as online throughout California.
At ēma therapy, I keep my caseload intentionally small so I can be flexible, responsive, and deeply present with each client. My rates reflect over a decade of experience, advanced training, and a commitment to supporting moms through the real challenges of matrescence, anxiety, identity shifts, trauma, and the overwhelm of motherhood.
You deserve a therapist who is highly trained, deeply invested, and tailoring care just for you.
Therapy Rates
For new cilents, I offer a free introduction session. Please note that I am an out-of-network provider and do not accept insurance at this time. I am paneled with Lyra which is an EAP program.
Mother/Child Relational Therapy
From newborns to teens
$280 per 50-minute session
Individual Therapy for Moms
For all stages of motherhood
$250 per 50-minute session
Want you use out-of-network benefits but not sure what is covered? Find out using Thrizer below.
Frequently Asked Questions
What does mother/child relational therapy look like?
Short + Fast Version
If you’ve been feeling disconnected from your child—whether you’re in the fog of postpartum, battling with a fiery threenager, or navigating the distance of a tween or teen relational therapy can help. Together, we slow down, get back to the basics of play and connection, and relearn how to enjoy each other again.
In session, we’re often on the floor playing, being silly, or working through simple activities that help you see and connect with your child in new ways. For older kids, we mix in talking, role-play, and skill-building, but play and experiential learning are always at the heart.
Parents usually leave feeling closer to their kids, more relaxed in moments of play and conversation, and more confident navigating the harder stuff when it comes up.
Expanded Version (for parents who want the details):
Have you been struggling with your connection with your child? Maybe you’re in postpartum and bonding feels harder than you expected. Maybe you’ve got a threenager who melts down at the drop of a hat and you can’t figure out how to play with them without losing your cool. Or maybe your tween or teen is starting to pull away, and it feels like your relationship is slipping out of your hands, sometimes it’s them raging at you, sometimes it’s both of you clashing.
Relational therapy is about pausing, coming together, and gently finding your way back to each other. Through an attachment and play-based lens, we slow things down, relearn how to connect, and create space for safety, silliness, and honest conversation.
My role in the room
I’m not here to judge your parenting or to “fix” your child. My job is to guide you both, sometimes by slowing the moment down, sometimes by offering new tools, sometimes by simply helping you feel less alone in the hard parts. Think of me as a safe third person who can spot what’s getting in the way of connection and help you find your way back to each other.
What sessions are like
For little ones: We’re often on the floor, reconnecting through the basics of play. Sometimes I’ll use play-based assessments at the start (a few simple structured activities you do together while I observe) to better understand where your relationship is at before we dive in.
For preschoolers and “threenagers”: We focus on playful connection while also practicing boundaries and ways to stay in relationship through the big feelings.
For older kids, tweens, and teens: Yes, we play too. Many older kids need a reset that comes from rediscovering childlike connection. We also talk, role-play, and practice skill-building, but the heart of the work is still play and experiential learning.
Parent-child sessions are typically 50 minutes long.
What it’s not
This isn’t about diagnosing or labeling your child. And it’s not about proving you’re a “bad” or “good” parent. It’s about helping you and your child rediscover each other, repair where things feel broken, and find new ways of being together.
What parents often leave with
Parents who do this work often describe feeling:
Closer to their kids than ever before
More relaxed and confident during play and conversations
Better equipped to navigate conflict without spiraling into guilt, shame, or frustration
And kids? They often start to soften, laugh more, and let their guard down because they can feel the relationship shifting too.
Can I use my out-of-network (OON) benefits?
Absolutely. If you have a PPO plan, you may be eligible to use out-of-network insurance benefits.
How it works: Using OON benefits traditionally means you are responsible for paying for each session in full at the time of your appointment. To make this easier for you, I partner with Thrizer, a platform that takes the "paperwork headache" out of the process.
No More Superbills: Thrizer automatically files your claims and handles the insurance paperwork so you can get your money back faster.
Thrizer Pay: This is a game-changer for many of my clients. Once you have met your insurance deductible, Thrizer Pay allows you to pay only your co-insurance amount (e.g., 20–30%) at the time of session. They wait for the reimbursement check from your insurance so you aren't out-of-pocket for the full fee.
Deductible Tracking: If you haven’t met your deductible yet, Thrizer still tracks every session and ensures it is applied correctly toward your deductible without you having to mail in a single form.
Note: Thrizer’s goal is to save you time and money. It's completely optional, and as your therapist, I do not benefit financially in any way from your participation.
Investment & Insurance
Therapy is an investment, and it is completely normal to have questions or worries about cost. I aim to be transparent so you can make the best decision for you and your family.
Do you accept EAP programs?
Yes. I am a proud paneled provider with Lyra Health.
In a world that doesn't always prioritize the transition into motherhood, your EAP is a rare and powerful tool to ensure you are taken care of. Many companies (like Qualcomm, Apple, and Amazon) provide up to 25 sessions per year at $0 out-of-pocket cost to you.
Pro-Tip: Lyra sessions typically bypass your deductible, making them an incredible resource for maternity leave or postpartum support. If you don't see an opening in the Lyra portal, please reach out to me directly as I hold additional space for these clients..
Do you take insurance?
I am an out-of-network provider and do not work directly with insurance companies. This is a purposeful choice that allows me to provide the high-quality, specialized care you deserve.
Why I choose this model for you:
Privacy & Freedom: Insurance companies require a formal mental health diagnosis and often limit the number or type of sessions you can have. By staying out-of-network, your care is dictated by your needs, not a corporate mandate.
Focused Care: This allows me to maintain a smaller caseload, ensuring I can show up fully for you as you navigate motherhood anxiety, identity shifts, and cycle-breaking.
Holistic Support: Many of the challenges of motherhood and matrescence aren't medical "conditions," yet they deeply deserve support. This model allows us to treat the whole person, not just a diagnosis.
What if I need to cancel a session?
I have a 48 hour cancelation policy. What this means is that I require 48hrs notice of a cancelation otherwise there will be a fee of the cost of a full session. This fee is not covered by insurance so would be out of pocket. The reason for this policy is to ensure that I am able to keep my doors open and my business running. It also allow me ample time to fill any openings and plan for breaks to the best of my ability.
Do you offer a sliding scale option?
Yes, I offer a limited number of sliding-scale fee slots for those who require assistance. (Currently all spots are full)
Will you work directly with my kids?
I’m crazy about kids. For a time, I worked with kids exclusively, and then I discovered that what kiddos need most is moms who are connected and tuned into themselves so they can be connected and tuned into their kids as well.
As a result I do not work with children as my primary client, but I provide mother/child relationship therapy to foster the connection and bond between mothers and their children. This type of intervention can be done at any age and stage of your kids development. I find it especially helpful for teens and tweens.
Can I bring my kids to the session?
Yes, you’re absolutely welcome to bring your child(ren) to therapy. As a mom, I understand that childcare isn’t always available, and life with little ones doesn’t pause for therapy.
Babies are always welcome. Whether it’s tummy time, feeding, or diaper changes, we’ll make space for what you and your baby need. You’re free to nurse, bottle feed, or do whatever feels right.
For toddlers or older kids, my office can be a cozy play space. Bringing a toy, book, or tablet can help keep them entertained.
Sessions may feel a bit different with children present. We might pause or use “code words” for sensitive topics, so we can stay focused while respecting their presence.
Therapy is for you and you deserve support, even when your little ones come along.
What’s your Privacy Policy?
At EMA Therapy, we value your privacy and are committed to protecting your personal information. This Privacy Policy outlines how we collect, use, and safeguard your data.
Information We Collect
We collect only the information necessary to provide you with the best possible therapy services. This may include:
Personal details (name, contact information)
Health information relevant to your treatment
Session notes and treatment plans
How We Use Your Information
Your information is used solely for:
Providing and improving our therapy services
Communicating with you about your care
Practice operations and quality improvement
Information Sharing
As a private pay practice, we do not share your information with insurance companies. We will only share your information:
With Mentaya, if you explicitly request and consent to this in writing
As required by law (e.g., in cases of imminent danger)
Your Rights
You have the right to:
Access and receive a copy of your records
Request corrections to your information
Ask us to limit the information we share
Request confidential communications
Data Security
We implement strong security measures to protect your information from unauthorized access, alteration, or destruction.
Changes to This Policy
We may update this policy periodically. Any changes will be reflected on this page.
Contact Us
If you have questions about this policy or your information, please contact Ellie Messinger-Adams LPCC 14196 here.
(Last Updated: 12/3/24)