I’m Ellie Messinger-Adams, a licensed therapist, maternal mental health specialist, and childhood development expert. I provide therapy for moms in San Marcos, Encinitas and across North County San Diego, as well as online throughout California.
Feel calm, confident, and connected—at every stage of motherhood.
Let’s get to the root of what’s holding you back from being the mom you want to be and heal from the inside out.
You’re always five steps ahead, juggling schedules, meals, emotions, and still wondering if it’s enough. The mental load is relentless, and anxiety hums in the background like static. But therapy for anxious moms in California can help you slow down, breathe, and finally feel calm again.
Here, we slow down. We bring the nervous system into the room. We make space for fear without letting it lead. Whether you’re pregnant, postpartum, or navigating the overwhelm of parenting, this is therapy for anxious moms who are done sprinting. You get to feel calm, think clearly, and be present, with your people and yourself.
Feel Calm
Therapy for Anxiety & the Mental Load of Motherhood
Feel Confident
Therapy for Perfectionism & Motherhood Identity Shifts
You’ve spent years pushing, proving, performing. Motherhood comes with an invisible measuring stick, and no matter how much you do, it never feels like enough.
Together, we’ll untangle those voices: perfectionism, people-pleasing, old survival strategies, and understand where they came from. You don’t need to be perfect. You just need space to be human, and still feel like enough.
Feel Connected
Therapy for Healing Trauma & Strengthening Bonds in Motherhood
You may not talk about what you’ve been through: your childhood, a hard birth, or the weight you carry, but you feel it. In how your body tenses when your child cries. In the grief that sneaks into your workday. In the moments you barely recognize yourself.
Sometimes it begins even earlier, when just imagining motherhood stirs up pain you haven’t had space to process.
Whether you’re planning, pregnant, postpartum or parenting, therapy offers a safe place to explore the stuck parts of your story with compassion. Together, we’ll give those places what they’ve always needed: care, safety, and a way forward, so you can step into motherhood feeling grounded, whole, and deeply connected to yourself and your child(ren).
"I thought I was
broken—
motherhood made that feeling
even stronger."
Sound familiar? Therapy can help you build the confidence to reach out, ask for help, and start creating the kind of support you’ve always needed.
Your story is unique. Whether you’re preparing for motherhood, raising little ones, or parenting older kids, we’ll move at a pace that feels right for you. Therapy isn’t one-size-fits-all. Together we’ll create an approach that fits you.
Below are some of the therapy modalities I lean on to support moms. The tools we can draw from to help you feel calmer, more confident, and more connected.
Acceptance & Commitment Therapy (ACT)
Motherhood can stir up tough thoughts and feelings, about yourself, your worth, or whether you’re “doing it right.” ACT helps you notice those thoughts without letting them take over, and choose actions that line up with your values. It’s about creating a life that feels meaningful, even when it’s messy.
Somatic Therapy
Anxiety shows up in the body as much as the mind. We’ll slow down, notice what’s happening inside, and release what’s been carried too long. These body-based tools help you feel more grounded, in motherhood and in yourself.
Attachment-Based Play Therapy (TheraPlay)
If you’re feeling disconnected from your child, or want to strengthen your bond, play therapy can help. Together, we’ll practice co-regulation and repair through play. It’s not about perfection, it’s about reconnection.
Brainspotting
When talking doesn’t reach the pain, Brainspotting helps your body release what’s been stored deep in the nervous system. It’s especially powerful for birth trauma, childhood wounds, or lingering grief you can’t quite name.
Internal Family Systems (IFS)
Maybe parts of you feel at odds — the achiever, the pleaser, the critic, the one who’s exhausted. IFS gives space for all of them, with compassion, so you can build more self-trust and inner calm. (Also known as parts work)
Practical Parenting Support
Motherhood doesn’t come with a manual. Whether you’re navigating baby sleep, toddler tantrums, or middle school pushback, I’ll offer practical guidance and emotional support so you feel more confident and connected in your parenting.